Seabhag's Wanderings

My atheism

2008-04-19T20:31:00.000-07:00

On a message board I used to haunt, and now only do so infrequently (don't quite know why). A post was made asking the board members what their religion, or 'belief system' was, what the predominant belief system was of the people they knew, and finally what it was for the region. A final question was posted, asking what the individual poster's view on atheists was. (I know, the grammar nazi's are going to kill me for that sentence.)

Here's my, fairly long, response to that final question.

"Seeing as I am an atheist I tend to have a pretty positive view of them. I was raised in a ultra-fundamentalist family but once I realized how much I'd been lied to about reality, I converted first to deism, then became an agnostic, and eventually an atheist. I'm part of the "I know I can't prove there is no god; but I find the concept of a god very highly unlikely" atheist crowd. Like Carl Sagan said, "Extraordinary claims, require extraordinary evidence"; having witnessed the death of my god (my conception of god at least) I'm unlikely to take on another without evidence.

I'm one of the more outspoken atheists, mainly because I live in a place that is SO Christian. Many of the people I know from the 'old days' would be quite happy with a Christian Theocracy. So I've become outspoken mainly as an attempt to give other non-Christians around me (atheist, agnostic, deist, poly/monotheists) knowledge that there is someone else who disagrees with the fundies. Not so much outspoken trying to prove there is no god (see my previous statement), but outspoken to provide resistance against the Christians who I know who are quite in love with the idea of that theocracy (not every Christian believes this I know).

My other reason for being outspoken is that as a chemist, with an interest in many of the other fields of science, and the scientific method in general, I see the (again this is among the ultra-fundamentalists) derision and scorn poured out on science and the scientific method. I fear another period similar to the Dark Ages if these theocratic minded Christians ever truly gained enough power; because of their scorn for reason based investigation and methodology.

That said, I don't believe in the idea of making it illegal to believe in the supernatural. Our species has used the supernatural for tens of thousands of years to explain the unknown. But, when a person's belief begins to go into the area of telling others what they can/cannot do I begin to worry. I believe it was the biologist PZ Myers who said that he thought that religion should become something like a knitting circle. Not interfering with people who don't want to knit (believe), but not made illegal by any stretch of the imagination.

As a chemist/scientist I find an amazing sense of wonder and awe at the universe around me. Both on the astronomical scale, and the molecular scale. The awe and joy I find in observing those is richer, and for me, purer than anything I experienced in my days as a theist."

Thus Spake Zarathustra

2008-02-18T20:35:00.001-08:00

I should probably recommend that you turn on the music for 2001: A Space Odyssey.   The main title track is named after this book.  So here are some passages I thought fascinating,
I'm reading from a edition published by "A Wlco Book" which is appearently based in India.
I picked it up at Borders for $7 or so.

From Zarathustra's Prologue Chapter 3
"All beings hitherto have created something beyond themselves: and ye want to be the ebb of that great tide, and would rather go back to the beast than surpass man?

What is the ape to man? A laughing-stock, a thing of shame. And just the same shall man be to the Superman: a laughing-stock, a thing of shame.

Ye have made your way from the worm to man, and much within you is still worm. Once were ye apes, and even yet man is more of an ape than any of the apes."

Interesting take on evolution. 'On the Origin of Species' was published in 1859, and by 1881 Nietzsche had written a book which dealt with the idea of being something more.

I recently (last fall) read Ishmael by Daniel Quinn and was fascinated by his idea of being a "Leaver" instead of a "Taker".   Having been raised in an environment where it was taught that we were to subjugate the earth, and it wasn't uncommon to hear other Christians mock people who were worried about taking care of the Earth ('it's all gonna get destroyed anyway when God comes back'); this book was a breath of fresh air. One of the better things about growing up in Missouri was the focus in the State on conservation.    So, I'd already had at least a tendency to lean towards the idea of taking care of the planet we live in.   Quinn's postulation that we quit evolving (with the Earth/other creatures at least) was a very interesting idea.     What if we had stayed as hunter/gatherers?   Well, for sure I wouldn't be writing this sitting in my room lit by compact fluorescent bulbs.   But, Quinn also asks the question (paraphrased) "Is it possible to use and enjoy technology for mankind without being Takers?".     I think it is; work being done in alternative fuels (come-on I know Ethanol isn't worth it but there 'are' other ideas out there that seem possible), and
hopefully more research into space colonization will help reduce the burden we put on ourselves
(pollution) and on our environment (pollution, excess waste, etc).

But back to the topic.   I find Nietzsche's concept of a "Superman" or a evolutionary 'next man' if you will quite interesting.   What might this evolutionary decendent of man be like?   Later in Zarathustra Niezsche said: (In chapter 4 of Zarathustra's Prologue)
"I love those who do not first seek a reason beyond the stars for going down and being sacrifices, but sacrifice themselves to the earth, that the earth of the Superman may hereafter arrive.

I love him who liveth in order to know, and seeketh to know in order that the Superman may hereafter live. Thus seeth he his own going down."

and a few lines later:

"I love him who is ashamed when the dice fall in his favour, and who then asketh: 'Am I a dishonest player?' - for he is willing to succumb.

I love him who scattereth golden words in advance of his deeds, and always doeth more than he promiseth: for his seeketh his own down-going."

Nietzsche used this theme of "down-going' or 'succumbing' in this chapter it seems as a way to describe mankind evolving into something more than itself and in turn standing by the side as countless other species have done before.    The virtues he describes, lack of pride, looking out that we are honest to the n'th degree, searching for knowledge, and it seems the lack of a need for a supernatural explanation for existance; are things I think quite worthy of striving for.   Who wouldn't want the world to be filled with people who were humble, unerringly honest, seekers for truth?   The problem comes in that first line; those who don't look to the heavens (beyond the stars) for their reason for living.

The world is filled with those who think that this life is 'filthy' or 'dirty' and just one stop along the way to a paradise where everything will be perfect and the 'old man' (the fleshly body) will be thrown aside for some imagined perfect body.    So why bother about taking care of the planet for our kids, and grandkids, and whatever humanity will evolve into?     Why worry that someday we might actually do enough harm to the planet in our quest for rule over it that we can't live on it?
If we look beyond the stars (to heaven) for our reason for existing then we wouldn't have to worry about that.   But it's when we realize that God is an imaginary, made up construct that used to suffice as a way to explain the world; and that religion no longer holds the "Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything" (The Answer is 42 of course) that we are able to look at ourselves, our posterity,
and our overuse of resources as motivation to do something about it.

In my case, my interest in "doing something about it" is to devote my life to research (and hopefully teaching) in chemistry.   I might not develop the next great breakthrough in fuels, or nanostructred materials. But, maybe as I attempt to learn to live with less impact and teach others; I'll be able to motivate the next Einstein, Bohr, Raman, Newton, etc.    Or maybe be plugging away every day I'll come up with something that will help.     We can go back to being gatherers (dependent upon the whims of the sun and weather); which could be catastrophic in the terms of how many people would die in the process. Or we can go forward, get out of this rut we've been in for a couple thousand years thinking that "The End is Near" and go about thinking about ways to make use of the environment/resources we have in a fashion that even if we never left Earth would leave flora/fauna and resources for our posterity, and maybe we'll be looked back on as the forefathers/mothers of a new species that surpasses us.

**I know.. A bit of woo there from a scientist. But, dreaming and vision drive us.   I also come from a very religious background so its been very hard to drive all the tendency to think that way out of my mind.   It is a work in progress.**

Cleaning House

2008-02-18T20:15:00.000-08:00

So, I've gone through my old posts. I've changed a lot over the last year and a half or so and decided I wanted my blog to reflect who I am, and some of what I've changed from. However, I didn't want the anger, and fustration of old to be how people saw me. I've got all the posts saved for reference if need be. But, I like the new me a lot more.

Do I get fustrated with people? Sure, all the time. Do I still dislike stupidity a lot? Heck yeah.   Do I foam at the mouth like I used to about stuff. I sure hope not.

I went from internally questioning my faith for years without realizing what I was doing; to finally realizing it and learning how to ask questions about ever other assumption that I'd made.

This has changed me. I hope, and think, for the better. Maybe it is the fact that time has aged me slightly as well.   Along the way I've read some books, thought (for me) deep thoughts, read deeper thoughts. Learned to get along with my family (even with extreme philosophical/religious differences), and learned to laugh, smile and enjoy life each day.

I've been reading "Thus Spake Zarathustra" (it's a nice break from Chemistry of Environmental Systems II, and research), recently. It's complex, fasinating; and interesting to see Nietzsche's influence on modern thought.

I'll post some of the sections that I thought were most fasinating and what I think was so fasinating about them in a later post.

Meanwhile, I've finished my undergrad degree. Right now I'm working on my Master's instead of trying to go straight to PhD school. Reasons are mainly that I have low enough self-esteem that I don't think I could get into PhD school without extra help. This help I plan on getting in the way of a M.S. in Chemistry with a thesis, research (and hopefully), my name on a few more papers.
I figure this will help overcome my appearant lack of skill when it comes to organic chemistry.

Speaking of which.   I mentioned once apon an aeon that I'd post here if I ever got published (or at least contributed to a paper which was published).

So here goes. The first paper I get to have my name on.

Penumetcha, Sai S.; Kona, Ravikanth; Hardin, Jonathan L.; Molder, Andrew L.; Steinle, Eric D. "Monitoring Transport Across Modified Nanoporous Alumina Membranes" Sensors, 2007, 7, 2942-2952.

You can read it here.   It's probably only interesting reading to boring people like me.  But, exciting non-the-less.

**Edit** Arg!!!! For some reason Blogger is seeing either just not wanting to do normal word-wrap editing, or it's seeing Opera weirdly.   But on my screen at least I have several lines which run WAY over their normal length and others which run WAY under.   I apologize for this. The previous editor has been sacked in the off chance it was his fault.

Just some ideas for development of space.

2007-07-07T20:42:00.000-07:00

So, I was browsing the web today and I came across this site . (BTW, thanks Michael for the link). Check out the number of bodies that orbit in our solar system that are over 200 miles in diameter. 88 total (mind you this includes the 8 planets, our sun, and all moons so not all are available for use). So, I did some number crunching. Depending upon what these "Dwarf Planets" or "Trans-Neptunian-Objects" are made up of I see some potential for mineral exploitation.

Think about it.. Total volume of an object 250 miles in diameter (round number closest to the smallest TNO) is about 8.177 million cubic miles. Some of that is going to be 'useless' material (more on this later). But some of it might be metals or other (directly) useful elements.

How might this help? Well, imagine being able to capture one of these bodies. We'll say for argument's sake that we can a.) Get out there ourselves, and b.) Figure out a way to propel it back towards Earth. Now, capture it into a Lagrange point (probably L4 or L5) and hollow it out. Leave say a 2-5 mile crust. (Here's where we first start running into technological limitations. I'm honestly unsure of if we could do this. However, I think if we take this idea as a goal to work towards while developing the ability to get a planetoid back to Earth we could do this). Mine out the metals (using some for structural reinforcement of the planetoid cause we'll want the thing to be stable at the end), and remove "non-useful" material. Once the planetoid has been hollowed out you should have a volume of about 7.2 Million cubit miles on the inside of the planetoid that's hollow. That's an internal surface area of about 180,864 square miles of potentially usable space.

During the extraction process oxygen, and nitrogen (the two main gasses essential for human life) could potentially be recovered from the planetoid and used to create an internal atmosphere. (note current estimates of about of nitrogen in asteroids is zero so nitrogen may need to be salvaged from other gas giants/moons). The assumption is made that if humanity could bring a planetoid back to a L4 or L5 point to be processed like this that we could then also start it spinning in such a way that the interior surface would have close to 1G of centrifugal force at/near the equatorial belt. This internal "gravity" would fall off till it reached close to zero at the 'poles'. This would then trap the 'atmosphere' near to the interior surface of the planetoid and enable this surface to be used for habitat (more on this later).

Extraction would start at one or both of the poles and once it was complete airlocks of some sort would need to be established to ensure retention of atmosphere/water. The crust being left at 2-5 miles thick is to ensure that cosmic radiation does not penetrate into the interior of the planetoid. This ensures that long-term exposure to radiation will not be a problem for inhabitants of the planetoid.

Another assumption is made here. That, because of the amount of energy required to move/spin a planetoid with a diameter of more then 200 miles, humanity will also have figured out some sort of answer to their current power problems. This might include power sources such as fusion, or a better adaptation of solar power. Solar power will cause the usefulness of this plan (as will be expanded later) to be less trans-Earth, but could still prove of some use. Also, fission will be problematic due to limited amounts of fissionable materials on Earth (or other planets/moons).

If such a power source is available then the planetoid can either be powered and allowed to be used as either a giant research lab (with gravity ranging from 1g down to microgravity conditions in an enclosed are), or perhaps a giant agricultural habitat. Depending upon our ability to understand weather (because such a large area will have some form of weather) the interior of the crust might even be sculpted during the extraction process to allow for better growing conditions.

Another possibility depending upon technological conditions on Earth at this time, especially depending upon if nanotechnology has shown to have true promise and a break-through has occured, or if it has fallen by the way-side and been discounted as wild-eyed dreams. If nanotechnology, or some sort of successor technology has provided industry with a way to process material into its constituent elemental components then there might be no truly 'useless' material scavenged from the inside of this planetoid. Instead the material could be used for construction, atmosphere, or simply to create soil to be used in a agricultural habitat.

What could these be used for then? Imagine a planetoid sitting either in a Lagrange point with the moon, or some other location where it wouldn't cause tidal problems for Earth. Lets say that the planetoid is 400 miles across. And lets say that it's been determined that as the size of the planetoid goes up the crust as to be thicker to provide proper stability. so we've got a 10 mile crust. That's a radius (of the internal sphere) of 190 miles. Plugging that into the surface area of a sphere and we end up with 453,416 square miles. If say, 50% of that was used as farmland, and the rest used for habitations/maintenance area. That's 226,708 square miles of farm-land. That's 6% of the total land-mass of the USA (including Alaska), or 7% if you don't include Alaska. Not that much right? It would be like dedicating the area of equal to two states the same size as Montana solely to farming. Not talking about land devoted to raising cattle or other animals. Heck, have yourself another planetoid devoted to that. Then think of this. With a pre-sculpted surface designed for optimal growing conditions (and some sort of light/heat source at the center of the planetoid designed to have day/night cycles), and a 365 day/year growing season; how much food could be produced? Maybe enough that we wouldn't need to have farms on Earth's surface? Maybe we wouldn't have to clear prairies, or rainforests for farm-land. "Maybe" because of agricultural planetoids, and the minerals cleaned out of them we wouldn't need Earth for anything besides a preserve.

Think then of what it would mean for travel between planets. If we wanted to explore, terraform, colonize, whatever any of the planets.. Why not 'build' another habitat? Design it with future agricultural use in mind. But instead of using it for farmland right away, use it as a giant ship providing lifesupport and 'gravity' for the inhabitance during the voyage. Then convert it to agriculture once orbit has been achieved.

With 51 TNO's and 4 astroids known to be larger then 200 miles in diameter there are probably more of these bodies then we could use to ensure plenty of food/science research, or simply enough living space for everyone. I saw somewhere (and now can't remember where) that any space-going vehicle designed to provide close to 1G of centrifugal force to act as gravity would need to be at least 200 meters in diameter so that the speed at which it had to spin would be low enough to ensure that the passengers didn't get sick. There are probably a lot more bodies out there that are smaller then 200 miles and larger then 200 meters in diameter (yes, I know I just used imperial and scientific measurements in the same sentence. so sue me). Use the smaller ones for personal craft. In that case they don't have to be hollowed out in a sphere. Just make sure that there is a cylinder at the center of the rock that is at least 200 meters in diameter. Then spin the rock around the axis that the cylinder makes up. This will give living space all along the inside of the rock.

Instead of mining metals from Earth to build spaceships. We should look at using the resources already out there to provide the living space for humanity as we leave the cradle and head first to the rest of the solar system, and then to the stars. Earth is our home. Why bother pulling it down around us? Indeed, if we leave it alone the biologists will have a field day watching from orbit what happens to the rest of the species on the planet. Instead of killing off thousands of species in our lifetime as we attempt to create "more space" we could leave our planet a better place then we "found it" (or were born on) and give the rest of the animals on the planet a fair chance of their own without a super-predator at the top of the chain.

Life in the old and new years

2007-01-04T21:55:00.000-08:00

So, I've been... thinking. Yes, I know that it's probably dangerous, but it's who I am.
Many things have changed since this time last year. I'm finally in the accelerated master's program; which bring along its own set of problems and headaches. But more important then that is that I've started discovering who I am and what I really believe. If you've followed my blog you'll see some of that journey. It's been long, but finally the internal conflict I was in has ended. My "superconscious", "ego" or "id" (depending upon the psychology term you prefer) had for long attempted to mold into the desire of my parents and my upbringing to believe in the Bible. But deep down my sub-conscious, (or whatever else you want to call it) rejected it for basic logical reasons. Understanding that, and realizing that I would never be able to reconcile what the Bible taught with what I had observed in the universe I was able to settle the internal conflict that had, at times, nearly driven me mad.
I am no longer the same person; all the peace, and joy that I was supposed to have felt as a Christian, I have found in understanding that I am agnostic/aethistic. The future is full of hope and promise. Sometimes life still sucks, but I now know that it is possible to make it better rather then sitting back waiting for "god" to make it better.
But, now I have another problem. I spent 4 years actively looking to understand the conflict within myself... Not even really knowing that that is what I was doing till I had done it. And now I have the problem that I'm sure effects people of just about any age, loneliness. No longer am I attempting to find the love of some "Supreme Deity" but I am now whole, the two halves of my "being" reunited I see the world with new and clearer eyes. But I still long for someone to love. I plan on living for a very long time, I also plan on making that ability to live for a long time available to anyone. Forever, is a long time to live without someone to love. At 26, almost 27 I already feel the weight of that absence every day. I can't imagine how it will be when I'm 1500 years old.
My personality doesn't lend itself to light and transient relationships. Part of it is probably due to my own code of... whatever you want to call it. Ethics? Being? Conduct? Honor?.. I have this way that I think my life should work.. Having 35 girlfriends, using one and throwing her out for the next isn't who I am... But I haven't met anyone that I feel I really click with and would want to wake up next to 1500 years from now. How does one enter a relationship to start with, and how does one find... "love"?? This is a mystery that has long eluded me and for once I am speaking about it, and how it puzzles me. I am a student, yet I cannot seem to learn the answer to this. And some days I wonder if I ever will.

The new year means many things for many people. For me it is a chance to learn more about myself and the universe around me. To make a mark on the world and, in some small way, craft it towards the vision I have for the future. It is another year that, unless something changes, I will spend alone.
I hang out with friends and have a good time; but it is not who I am. Deep inside as much as I enjoy a party I would much rather sit and discuss some deep intellectual problem, or play a thinking game with a few close friends. I find more fulfillment in hanging out with a bunch of chemistry geeks (classmates) who enjoy crafting plays on words, or discussing religion, politics or any number of intellectual pursuits then I enjoy a night full of drinking and other activities.
Maybe when I write next year I'll have found more of an answer to why the world seems lonely for me. Wish me luck as I make my own.

I just 'love' Christmas...

2006-12-26T18:54:00.000-08:00

First of all, Bah-Humbug. :-) I am currently in New York for Christmas with my family at my mom's family's place on Long Island. I flew out here so I don't have to worry about the drive back with my family in the crowded minivan, but I do have to fly back on a crowded plane.. :-p

Christmas just isn't that much fun for me. First of all, as is evidenced by my last post, I'm not too into following Christian, or other mythological holy days (for all that I am interested in mythologies in general) so I don't see much point in it. Also, since it was around this time of year that a girl I was really really interested in turned me down pretty hard I usually associate this time of year with that feeling of rejection. Just makes me want to have this time of year come around...

In other news I'm reading up a storm while I can over the Christmas break (I guess it is good for something), so far I've read Powersat by Ben Bova, We Few by David Weber and John Ringo, I'm halfway through "The Merlin Trilogy" by Mary Stewart (The Crystal Cave, The Hollow Hills, & The Last Enchantment), I've also started Thus Spake Zarathustra by Friedrich Nietzsche. The edition I purchased (Don't have it with me so I don't remember which edition it was) had a forward by his sister (a Nazi sympathizer who according to some sources selectively edited some of his early editions (after his death) to be more sympathetic towards the Nazi party line) and I was amazed at some of the similarities in thought between Nietzsche and myself. Not that I am a deep philosopher or anything like that. But that his thoughts came to him in flashes that he then spent months afterwards thinking through and working out all the fine points of the 'revelation'. I have experienced the same thing many a time as a sudden though will come to me as if a door in my mind had opened and a new vista of understanding had opened up unto me. No, I'm not trying to make myself sound as if I was some brilliant thinker or gifted in some way, rather just happy to see that someone else had experienced the same flashes of inspiration that I have.
That said, I've spent about two hours so far reading the book, and I've covered about 5 or 10 pages. Each page and each line is full of thought and things to think over.

That'll be it for right now, we are leaving in the morning to drive up to CT, to visit some more relatives, and drive back the same day because I leave in the morning from here to fly back home.

In regards to the flight here and back, the Atlanta airport is one of the best airports I've ever gone through. The layout and tram system was excellent.

The Vista of Endless Possibilities

2006-10-28T22:37:00.000-07:00

So, the last few months have been interesting. Some of my friends who read this already know somewhat about what's happened but I'll see if I can put it into words...

If it's not already appearent from some of my latest postings of attempts at prose there was a point where I was very depressed. Probably have been for the past at least 4-6 years. However, that's changed a lot.

In April or May (can't remember which now) I was sitting in a service my church was having for college age young adults and the guy who was talking said something that caught my attention. He said, "If it seems like you haven't heard from God for a while go back to the last time you know you heard from Him and see where you went off track". It sounded good so I started thinking... And I realized that I'd never 'heard' from God. No matter how many times I prostrated myself asking to hear the slightest bit from Him, the heavens were silent. So then I started thinking; the two main belief systems in the Christian church are Free-Will or Predestination. If Free-Will was right and I was coming to God as openly and honestly as I could then why didn't He respond as the scriptures said He would? (See verses on drawing near to God, or calling on the name of the Lord to be saved.) If the thought that Predestination was right then no matter what I did, if I wasn't 'predestined' to be saved then no matter how much I wanted to know God, I would never be given the opportunity to and it certainly seemed that I wasn't being given the opportunity.

So there I was, sitting in a service and realizing that either I wasn't going to be saved no matter how much I wanted to, or God didn't really pay attention to the universe after all (because the Bible certain wasn't right in that all my praying to God certainly hadn't brought Him near). I had no doubts that there "WAS" a God (a being beyond comprehension responsible for the formation of the universe) but I realized that nothing I'd seen in the world (except for its existance) needed supernatural explanations. Everything was the cause of some event, sometimes events that were beyong the limited scope of what we could see (a little chaos theory here, a sort of 'butterfly effect', the causes were certain natural, we just couldn't necessarily observe them).

Once I realized in that moment (this train of thought took under 3 minutes) that I didn't believe in a God who interveined in the world on a daily level, it was like a light went on.

Imagine for me if you will... You are in a dark place, you cannot see beyond arm length and every step that you've taken has been directed by fear of some unseen hand who is supposed to have everything planned out exactly, and no matter what you want to do things will happen as directed by this hand. Then imagine if you will... A string of brilliant lights come on and you can actually see where you are. Instead of some cold, damp, dreary place like you'd thought from what you could hear around you... You are in a cavern, vast, and glittering.... Glittering with heaps of treasures and wonders beyond belief. Each one a possibility. Imagine a mammoth dragon's horde of treasure from the Germanic legends of yore, or maybe the smaller treasure horde of Smaug the dragon from Tolkien's "The Hobbit". Mounds of gems, jewels, gold, and other treasures, more then you can possibly comprehend. Each one a possibility open and awaiting the grasping.

Or if the fantasy images I just described don't appeal to you check out this link or this or maybe this or finally this (warning large pictures best viewed at 1600X1200 or higher). These increadable vistas are of stars, each one with possibilities. Worlds, planets, potential, possiblities. Endless, unknown, and just over the hill might lie endless wonder and delight.

This was how my world, and view of the world opened up. Suddenly anything was possible, all I had to do was to want to grab it. Hope filled me life a roaring river. As I walked outside that night and felt the rain on my face, the lightning flashing overhead, I no longer felt fear. Instead my dread of what some being might choose for me to do was replaced with the endless hope of possibilities. I began to realize that to question everything about the universe wasn't a sign of disrespect to the Creator, that indeed to question if there was one and how the Universe showed the aspects of It was the highest form of worship. No lofty, holier-than-thou attitudes. No abasing oneself before some deity that is beyond comprehension and capable and willing to strike one down for the slightest hint of questioning.

The months following this have been hard at times. My family thinks I've totally strayed from the 'path of righteousness'; and that someday I'll return 'to the fold'. But I know better. After having seen the sunrise of possibilites from the mountain top of hope why would I choose to go back to the dark dank caves of organized religion in which all members are required to live without light, without hope, and at the whims of those who claim that they can see the way to the next cave? Why would I choose to live with the mountains pushing down all around me, when instead I can stand atop the mountains and let them hold me up among the clouds unvailing wonders with every passing day?

I am still nothing more than human; I still have wants, hurts, fears, hopes, dreams.... But all of these things just make up the journey that is life.
"All of my songs can only be composed of the greatest of pains
Every single verse can only be born of the greatest of wishes
I wish I had one more night to live" -- Nightwish.

The jounery is made all the more wonderous by the pains, and sucesses we achieve along the way. There is pain but we can see that which causes it. Each scrape shows how we learned to go from crawling under the mountains, to walking aright amoungst the mountains, to sailing among
the stars.

Cheers. Maybe I'll post more later.. School's been crazy maybe I'll talk some more about it in a future post.

Seabhag

What else is happening in life

2006-07-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

Well, yeah it's been a while since I really did a content update here. Prose doesn't count as serious content, or at least as content that tells what is actually happening recently.

I finished my junior year of my biochemistry degree without too much hassel. For my English 2 Technical Writing course I wrote a paper on "Embryonic Stem Cell Research and Ethics." My English instructor gave me a 95% and said that it was "well organized and easy to follow". Blew my parent's minds. Mom keeps remembering when she had a hard time getting me to write one sentence let alone an eight page paper that she didn't have to correct.

Like my little side-bar says, I've been accepted into the accelerated master's program at Missouri State University. I'm working this summer on a research assistantship. The professor who's my research advisor for this is the same one who sponsored me for admission into the master's program. The work I'm doing this summer will end up contributing to my thesis. Which currently looks like it will be over detection methods for detecting chemical warfare agent simulants (since the real stuff is too dangerous to have in the lab). Probably using GM/MS (gas chromatography/mass spectrometry) methods, though we'll probably do some SEM (scanning electron microscope) to round out our work. As/if anything gets published I'll post the article title, and journal of publication so that I can crow about it.

This fall I'll be taking 3 classes, Physical Chemistry I, Biochemistry I, and Intro to Genetics. I'll also be teaching, probably General Chemistry Lab, or something like that. The really nifty thing is that I'll be getting paid, and fee wavers for some of my classes so that I'll be making more in single semester than I did the entire year last year. And I'll be making that every semester it looks like at least till the end of the 2007-2008 school year. I'll have to figure out how to pay for my last semester of school (for my masters) but other then that its going good.
Oh yeah... I'll get to use red ink to grade papers with.... BWAHAHAHAHA!!!! ::coughs:: okay.. I'm better now.

I'll try to keep more up to date with this if I can.

Bad week to be my friend.

2006-07-06T19:59:00.000-07:00

Okay, I sorta feel bad this week for anyone who's a friend of mine. So far this week my mom has had a masectomy (recovering very nicely dr's are quite happy). Semirrahge decided to go and get a collapsed lung. Amy (long-time friend) was diagnosed with AML. So far that's all that I know of that's happened to friends. But definatly bad enough. Sem is, last time I talked to one of his sisters, doing well. He's on oxygen, and has called me TWICE from ICU on his cell phone, guy is a total nut.

So, to all my friends out there. Sorry in advance, and I hope y'all stay safe the rest of the week.

Walls

2006-05-18T05:22:00.000-07:00

Behind marble walls I sit
Cold stone beneith me
Mirroring my heart
Frozen tears
Running down stone
Heart or marble
I cannot tell

Towering Spires
Piercing the sun
And moon
My heart feels
Their pain
I am pierced through

Wounded once
I built walls
Soon,
The walls built themselves
von Newman's Children
The Halls Keep
Their Prisoner
Safe

Now through
Crystal Marble Walls
I see
Others in castles
Warm,
Glowing
Sharing
Their Castles
With Doors
Wide Open

I Long
In Part
To Follow
Their example
But Then
I See Again
The Words
Like a Rune-Carved Knife
That Pierced
My Heart

And I Remember
Why I Started
The Walls.
To Shield
My Heart
From Another
Runic Blade

Will the Norns
Ever Fate
One to Come
And Melt the Walls
And Free Me
From the Frozen
Walls of Stone
And Tears?

** As an aside Jon von Newman is or was considered the father of the concept of self-replicating machines, aka von Newman's Children. He was also involved with the origins of modern computing, game theory and other seemingly diverse concepts.

** For who, or what the Norns are see the definitions in my previous post. Though this was written before that one I just found it again and decided to post it.

** As for what a Runic Blade, or a Rune-Carved Knife are. It's a sort of bone tossed to modern fantasy, and some much older trains of thought. In modern fantasy a weapon (bladed or otherwise) can sometimes be carved with runes to give it mystical power. Sometimes, it is the ability to cut through armor like a hot knife through warm butter, other times it can, like the Nuzgul blades in The Lord of the Rings, attempt to poison the victim and potentially change who or what they are. The concept of runes is more of a Norse based idea then from other classical myths. Their very written language was 'runes' and these could be cast to attempt to devine the future from the Norns. At some point these came to be used for talismans for protection for the wearer. Eventually, I think under modern fantasy influance especially Tolkien, these runic carvings for protection changed from being a piece of wearable jewelry to part of an offensive weapon.

Prose.

2006-03-12T20:30:00.000-08:00

Here sit I
In my own
Gehenna
Hope
That precious thing
Daily resembles
The liver of
Prometheus

Daily renewed
Daily plucked
From my soul
By Urd
Daily shredded
By Skuld

The Moirae
Mock me
Daily I attempt
To scale Bifrost
And daily
It shatters

I long to meet
One who
Will keep
My hope
From the wrath
Of the Furies

To feel
Her breath
Soft and Warm
As if from
The Fields of Elysian

To go from
Hel's dreary realm
Safely across
The Rainbow Bridge.

I haven't finished this, but it's all that I feel like working on right now. For some definitions see the following.

The Rainbow Bridge -- Aka Bifrost, depending upon the sourse, either a rainbow colored bridge, or a bridge in the three primary colors. Also depending upon the source, will either shatter at the end of time, or when a mortal tries to step foot on it. (in the sources saying it will shatter at the end of time, it is too steep for a mortal to traverse).

Moirae -- Aka The Fates, or the Furies.. Three crones in Greek mythology who determined the fates, and/or deaths of both mortals and gods

Prometheus/Prometheus' Liver -- For deciving the Greek gods Prometheus was chained to a mountain/rock and an eagle/vulture came every day and plucked out his liver to eat, and each day his liver regrew.

Urd/Skuld -- Two of the three Norns in Nordic mythology. Seem to be counterparts of the Fates/Furies.. Urd was sometimes known as "Fate" and Skuld was sometimes known as "being."

Gehenna -- "Place of Torment" in the Judeo-Christian religions it is sometimes used to refer to Hell.

Hel -- Nordic goddess of the dead. She rules those who don't die in battle. Her realms are usually considered to be gray, and cold. She herself is black on one side of her body, and white on the other. Her hair is also 1/2black, 1/2 white however, it is usually depicted as being opposite the sides that the colors are on her body.

Elysian Fields -- In Greek Mythology lands to the north of peace and eternal summer. Those chosen by the gods are sent here to live in peace.. The winds here are soft and warm.

Seabhag

"Back"

2005-07-22T21:34:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's been over a month since I went on my trip and I haven't written. This is mainly because I've been trying to give my brain a rest. I seem to write better during the school year when my brain is in high gear rather then when I'm trying to catch up on sleep and other such stuff.

Not much really going on at the moment. I've got the pharmacy gig on Saturdays; lights at church on 2-3 Sundays a month. Otherwise I've been taking it easy. Working for my dad some to help make some supplimental income.

Today it reached 101 degrees with a heat index of 105 degrees (that's Fahrenheit not Celsius or Kelvin). Today was an excellent day to stay indoors with the A/C running and let my sheets dry on the line (didn't take very long :-P )..

So, tomorrow is supposed to be hotter then today; and guess what. The pharmacy owner(s) don't seem to like setting the A/C to under 85degrees at night, so it takes like 2 hours on a normal day to cool down. Since it's supposed to be in the upper 70's tonight and 101-102 tomorrow I'm afraid to think of what the temps will be like in there. Thankfully I don't have to run lights at church on Sunday as I will probably end up with heat rash, or heat exaustion, I'm not really sure which is worse. (Antartica seems like a loverly place to move to).

Okay, later folks, that is if anyone still reads this after I've left it alone for over a month.

Seabhag

Trip

2005-06-08T19:37:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a trip this weekend to Chicago. I'm planning on leaving either Saturday evening or Sunday morning.. then I'll come back Friday in time to get to work on Saturday. So.. Wish me luck, a safe trip, and a good time.

Seabhag

Posting Again

2005-06-05T05:40:00.000-07:00

This will be brief as I'm headed out to church to run lights for the services.

So, I finished Organic Chem II with a C. Not the B or even A that I wanted. But, I DID pass the class and am able to move on. Other classmates have said the next few classes will be like going back to college algebra after getting through Calc II. So it "should" be easier.

I've been working for my dad some earning money to take a trip up to Chicago to visit old friends. I'll leave for that next Sunday morning.. (Kwann if you read this before then, call me I wanna see if I am able to stop by and say hi either on my way up or my way back.)

I've also applied to a local printshop for a job in their bindery; I'm not sure if that job will work out as they only have one shift and most of my classes are during that shift. I do, however, I have the name of another printshop in town that might be hiring, and they run more then one shift. We'll see how that goes. I want out of the pharmacy and back into a job I know/like.

Speaking of the pharmacy. Yesterday was insanely busy. Between 8:30-10:30 we filled over 100 scripts. Between 8:30-3:00 we filled 220-230 scripts... Notice when almost half of them had been filled by? Then don't forget to take into account that the Medicaid computers were down till like 11:30 so that any scripts called in that needed to be run through Medicaid couldn't be filled till after 11:30. I would say that we got 70% of the calls for the day by 11:00AM. And it was hot; that made the people coming in really mean... Either that or it was the fact that they all came in at once (very rarely did only a single person enter the store... usually it was 3-6 at a time), but the customers were VERY mean/angry yesterday.. Great way to make the day go faster.

Finally, I've been spending quite a bit of time playing World of Warcraft... I played it in Beta... I knew I'd like it.. But, due to how much you can end up playing I realized it would be best to not even think of picking it up till AFTER school was out.. And boy was I right.... :-)

I'll post more later..

Seabhag

(And I'll have to find out if my family has the picture they took when they said I looked like a person from the 70's.....)

Finals

2005-05-04T15:29:00.000-07:00

I will not be posting much of anything here till the 11th or 12th. My last 3 finals are on Wednesday the 11th and so I will be vewy vewy busy till then.. Check back after then and I might have some cool new rant up (or at least a rant that I think is cool

Seabhag

Sucky Day

2005-04-26T18:43:00.000-07:00

Okay, today officially sucked.

My knee started acting up yesterday morning. Long story, basically I fall into a catagory of something like "Hypermobility." This basically means that my ligiments and tendons are really... loose. It's caused carpel tunnel in my wrists, and makes it where my kneecaps "float" around and start getting inflamed. This however was worse then just an inflamed kneecap. One moment it was fine.. The next I could barely put any weight on it. So, I limped around the rest of the day. This morning? Still couldn't put much weight on it. So, I wrap one of the knee braces I have around it and set out to goto school. On the way to my car I feel a nail start to pierce the bottom of my right shoe.. Problem, the nail in a board, that has another nail sticking up farther down, this eliminates any sort of throwing myself into a roll to avoid puncturing my foot. I also cannot put enough weight onto my left leg to shift my balance quick enough. So.. YOUCH.. The nail punctured my shoe, and went into the bottom of my right foot. So, I go back inside (making myself late for class) and take off my boot and sock and clean the wound and put a band-aid on it so that I can at least just get to class. So now I'm really limping.. puncture wound in one foot, some sort of weakness in the knee of the other leg..

So, that was pretty crappy... Then it almost got worse.. I'm in my Organic Chem II lab.. I've got this conconction sitting on a hot plate cooking away. On the hot plate I have a 5mL vial and that's hooked up to a "refluxer" The refluxer has two ports that you attach a water-in line and a water-out line to. Cold water is circulated through the refluxer allowing a solution to be heated to above it's boiling point without loss of solution. (The cooler refluxing tower causes the vapor to recondense and flow back into the vial). Pretty cool stuff.. So I've been watching this thing cook for about 35 minutes or so.. And my phone rings.. It's my dad so I pick it up and walk out into the hall. This mixture is supposed to cook for another 25 minutes or so and the temp is really stable so "no worries." I wasn't in the hall for more then 45 seconds when someone in the lab yells "JOHN your experiment blew up!!!" I hung up with my dad and raced into the lab to see what'd happened.. Thankfully, my lab hadn't blow up.. Instead the water in hose had decided that it didn't want to put the water into the refluxer anymore, and instead wanted to allow it to dribble (at a high rate of flow) all over the electric hot-plate, top of the vial with my solution, etc.. So, got that cleaned up and was able to get a different hose and continute the process. It would have really sucked to have had to start over on the experiment.... Especially since I finished the lab with 25 minutes to spare. (get it? I wouldn't have had enough time to actually FINISH the lab if I'd had to start over)

Okay... I've got an Organic Chem II test at 9AM.. so I've GOT to get back to studying for it.

Lata

Seabhag

I'm sorry Dave.

2005-04-21T19:25:00.000-07:00

Newscientist reports about a contraption named "HAL" or "hybrid assistive limb". A sort of electro-mechanical suit designed to give the wearer extra strength. Promoted in said article as a possible way to give the elderly a method of transportation or mobility. I think it would be.. ironic, and the universe seems to enjoy irony, if said suits suddently decided that they didn't want to work any more. Or allow their wearers to enter certain locals. Equipping them with voice boxes so that they might be able to more readily quote to their wearers. "I'm sorry Dave, I can't let you do that"

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm a big fan of technology used in really cool creative ways. But, sheesh people. Pick a better name then "HAL" for your suit.

Oh well.. I'm probably grumpy cause I had to goto the dentist today and get three cavities filled on the left side.. I wanted to kill the dentist at one point.. But he was a really nice guy and tried to make me as comfortable as he could. Seems my body likes to "reject" normal numbing mecications. He had to "reapply" some lidocaine during the 30 minutes or so he was drilling the cavity out cause the numbness was already wearing off. Reapplication is done via a big-a$$ needle that they jab into your mouth.. No thanks. And yet.. I made an appointment to get the OTHER side done in 3 weeks. (seems I have one more cavity over there). I'm an idiot.

Seabhag

music, music all around

2005-04-13T20:36:00.000-07:00

... And nothing to listen to.

I have my entire CD collection ripped to *.mp3 or *.ogg files. As well as a portion of my folks (set up to allow them to get it over the network so that they don't distroy any more disks). 27.7 GB of music/audio books.. (I also like really high quality so I usually rip at VBR/High Quality). If you said 1 min = very roughly 2 megabytes (less I know but rounding up). Then I've got about 96 HOURS of music/audio books on my computer (audio books are closer to 30 minutes per 5 MB so that skews the whole equation but we'll keep the 96 hour number right now.

So... I went through the ENTIRE "*:\music\*" directory to find SOMETHING to listen to that was new. However, I figured out why I can't do any more memorization for chemistry class... It's all filled up with music.. I couldn't remember anything in my 96 hours of music that I could listen to and think was.... "fresh"

I admit it.. I am an... super geek.. And with no money that 96 hours worth of music isn't looking to expand anytime soon much to my dismay.. A person can only listen to a song so many times over before it gets really... boring..

Okay.. I found a few things.. maybe.. an hours worth or so.. lets see how much of it "feels" new enough to stand listening to..

Sheesh....

Seabhag

Da Bleedin' Days

2005-04-12T20:55:00.000-07:00

Okay.. So a couple weeks ago I woke up with what I thought was a toothache.. Then since it moved on to hitting multiple teeth I figured it was a sinus infection. Then it seemed to settle in one tooth.. So I went to the dentist. I normally NEVER take anything stronger then an ibuprofren but I was hurting so bad that I dug around my mom's medicine chest where she keeps any left-over meds.. I found a Darvocet. This is 300mg of Codine along with like 325mg of aspirin or something. I took that and it "helped" for a few hours.. long enough I could actually get some sleep. Dentist took lots (4-5) of x-rays and said that he couldn't find any cavities or splits in the tooth that might cause the pain but that my sinuses looked kinda inflamed. So he gave me a script for cephalexin (Keflex) and I started taking that. So I took that for like.. a week or so.. And I thought everything was clearing up. Meantime I'd "passed" (through my nasel cavity) a chunk of.... "something." What it was I'm still not sure but after it was gone my sinuses seemed to be much better, and I thought I was on the road to recovery.. Then last Saturday.. I realized that if I blew my nose.. I got blood.. Just plain blood.. No muscus.. Just blood.. Then I realized that I kept doing this thing with my throat like I had something stuck back there.. when I spit it out I realized that my sinuses must be bleeding or something as I had blood draining down the back of my throat as well.

So.. Monday afternoon I "finally" went to the doctors.. Turns out I also had a fever (which I almost never do so I didn't even check) and he said he thought it was just a sinus infection turned really bad so he gave me a more specific antibiotic.. It seems to be helping as I'm not getting as much blood showing up.. But it was DEFINATLY a very WEIRD experience...

Anyways... I'm going back to Organic Chem II homework that's due in the AM.. Lata

Seabhag

Just when you thought you'd seen it all.

2005-03-28T21:25:00.000-08:00

Questions about what to do when your loved one passes away?

More money then you possibly know what to do with?

Here is the answer. Lifegems. This Bold, New, Up-and coming company will take the remains of your loved one and extract the elemental carbon from their corpse. Then they will turn that carbon into up to fifty 1ct diamonds. The only real limit on how many they make is up to you. How much do you want to spend??

Wow.. While I made up most of the advertising the essential parts are from their page. Wild stuff. Never know "what" you'll find next on the web.

Seabhag

Wow

2005-03-02T04:51:00.000-08:00

Okay, so.. "again" I'm watching my classical myth lectures. I have a test in it tonight so I'm watching and re-watching it to make sure that I do good in it.

When talking about the Delphic Oracle of Apollo in Delphi the prof made an interesting comment.
"As you are leaving the Delphic... if you drove to the Delphic Oracle of Apollo. To consult the Oracle, see the sights, bask in the Bellybutton of the Universe. And were they to slap a bumper sticker on your car as you drove out. Or your chariot, or your horse. It would say one of these things. "Curb thy spirit" "Observe thy limit" "Hate Hubris" "Keep a reverent Tongue" "Fear Authority" "Do not glory in Strength" "Bow down before the Divine" "Keep woman under rule" "

Appearently these are all pieces of grafiti that have been found in the ruins of Delphi.
But more importantly. You could almost sware that you were reading bumper stickers that had been slapped on the back of vans leaving the ATI Conference in Knoxville (or wherever they hold it now). That last line especially. "Keep Woman under Rule".. That sounds like a LOT of modern ultra-neo-conservative groups. Now, I don't consider myself liberal.. But these groups IBLP and one which I can't remember the name but is run by a guy named uh.. Doug Philips I think. These groups seem to me to be more out to promote a patriarchial society based on the suppression of women then to actually promate anything spiritually beneficial.

Food for Thought

**Edit: 2/18/07: I'd have to modify this a bit, and say that I now consider myself fairly liberal as compared to how I used to think.

Classical Mythology

2005-03-01T18:03:00.000-08:00

So, I'm watching one of my classical mythology class videos. There was a guest lecturer talking and the subject was Aphrodite. Greek goddess of love. The lecturer was a 60+ year old woman, maybe 5'6" high.. Close to 160-180 lbs. Talk about the eppitomy of the oppsite of Aphrodite..

That was a hidious hour of class..

It'd have been nice if the guest lecturer had looked a little closer to Aphrodite. :-P

Seabhag

Mystery Religions and IBLP

2005-02-27T13:40:00.000-08:00

Well, knowing that I think that IBLP is a performace based religion I was quite amused when I came across this gem in my Classical Mythology class.

"Mystery Religions:
A Mystery Religion is an organized or semi-organized form of worship promising immortality in return for following a ritual or lifestyle".

Sounds like someone just pegged IBLP center mass with a .50 caliber bullet.

My Classical Myth professor was using this to describe three "mystery religions" of the ancient greeks. the Eleusinian, Bacchic and Orphic mystery religions. Might as well add a fourth huh?

MYSTERY BABYLON THE GREAT THE MOTHER OF PROSTITUTES AND OF THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH (Revelation 17:1-5)

Is IBLP the foundation to Mystery Babylon? :-P I'm kidding here.. But... Seriously folks. From the outside, after having been inside. If you are still trapped in IBLP you need to get help from someone not trapped in it to help you get out of it.

LOL... I'm watching my Classical Myth class (video) and the professor was just talking about the "Greek" organizations and called one of them.. "Tapa Kega Day" (Tap a Keg a Day).. Sorry that was a side note but it was humorous.

Seabhag

Oops.

2005-02-17T19:31:00.000-08:00

I do rightly apologize. As I was sitting here working on a paper for my Creative Writing class I remembered that I'd left out another of my favorite comics.

A Miracle of Science deals with Mad Scientist disease. So throughout the story you have maniacal laughter from mad scientists who build guns capable of blowing up lots of stuff. Main character is a recovering mad scientist.

Favorite Webcomics

2005-02-16T16:47:00.000-08:00

Okay, I'm too tired tonight to think of a good rant. Unless it's against excesses of homework.
I spent 7 or 8 hours last night working on an Organic Chem II take home test. Thankfully that's done.

So, instead of ranting I'm gonna do a post on my favorite web-comics And maybe a quick liner about why I like said comic.

First and foremost. Schlock Mercenary Written by a gent by the name of Howard Taylor this strip has been around since June of 2000. The author now draws this strip full time so there's rarely a day that he doesn't update. The story line takes place in the far future. It is chock full of mercenarys out for the bottom line. Big guns and the grunts who carry them.

Another would be Sluggy Freelance. This author isn't full time but gets a comic up most every day anyhow. On-line since August of 1997 this is a long running strip. Big guns, demons, ghosts, vampires and robotic chicks. Then of course the fuzzy cute talking animals.... AHAHH!! No... No... Bun-Bun I WASN'T talking about you.. ugh.. give me a second to pick pieces of me up.. Bun-Bun is the killer lop rabbit of the story. Fear the Rabbit.

I also enjoy GPF. General Protection Fault. It's been around since 1998; interesting storyline and twists and turns. Terminator rip-offs. It's a geek thing.

Well, I've got a ton of homework left so I'll have to call it quits for the night now. Watch this space for more rants once I get some sleep

Seabhag

Probably the worst day in the world.

2005-02-14T13:28:00.000-08:00

Today, "St. Valentines Day" has got to be one of the worst days of the year. Like it's not bad enough during the rest of the year seeing couples together. Then they have to go have a day that celebrates the fact that they got lucky and us singles haven't yet.

So.. Here's my propsition. (hehe.)
Have a day where instead of leaving the single people out the couples (or at least just one of them) takes a friend or group of friends who are single out.

Either that or parents of the world need to loosen up their grip on their kids or have more daughters instead of sons.

Asking girls out is a new realm for me after being so brainwashed in the whole "can't even make eye-contact with a female" way that IBLP has. I was so brainwashed in that idea that I even attempted to once participate in their "proper" way to ask a girl out.

This basically consisted of saying nothing to the young lady at all tell I'd so bottled up the emotions that had no simple outlet that I couldn't help but ask her dad if I could "court" her in an attempt to marry her. d'oh. THAT was a bad move.. Being so engrained in "their" mindset though that it took 3 years of wondering "what I did wrong" before I realized that the only thing wrong that I did was to not just ask her out and get to know her better before becoming actually serious about any kind of relationship.

So.. 3+ years later, learning that I need to get over my deeply engrained brainwashing that was IBLP I started just hunting around for a nice girl to ask out..

Know what? I think that they are all taken.
Here's my thoughts on the idea.

"Girls are like parking spots.
All the good ones are taken, or are in a different lot.
All the ones that are left are way out there of handycapped."

So... Here I go facing another Valentines day with no close female friend (I actually have female friends now which is a major step) to treat nicely and show off to other singles.. :-P

Boy.. This was a rambling pointless post. But I had to rant about something. I needed the break from application essays.

later
Seabhag

REU's and You

2005-02-11T18:33:00.000-08:00

REU... The National Science Foundation's "Research Experience for Undergraduates" is a cool concept. Give grants/funding to universities who are carrying on a varity of research programs. Chemistry, Astronomy Physics etc. Each school has a professor (with a doctorate in his/her field) ,who has an area of interest, and oversees at least one or more students for a 8-12 week period. During this time each student, sophmore or juniors usually, learns how to: create a research concept, plan the concept/idea out, use lab equipment, write coherent reports on information learned, and present said information.

Why'd I give this overview? Cause I've spent the last 4 hours working on my own applications. I'm sending out 5 applications to schools who look like they've got some interesting research directions that they are going. Loyola University of Chicago, University of Connecticut, South Dakota State University, and two to two different departments at Stony Brook State University on Long Island New York.

I'm really hoping to be able to get a research internship this summer as well as maybe next summer also. Said internships would do several things for me. Help with my grasp of concepts, always helpful to keep up and even ahead of my learning. It will also look really good on a resume after I graduate to have said internships, along with research done at my own university (which I hope to start next semester) . Since I hope/plan to be a research chemist having lots of research experience will greatly increase both my starting salary (always helpful) and my ability to procure a job.

Friends' Blogs

2005-02-10T11:54:00.000-08:00

Till I figure out how to link to friend's blogs in a more perminant fashion this will have to do.

Here is Bakemono Senpai's Site.
This is Semirrahge's site

I'll get other's up late.

Here is a link for my school's main web-site.

Seabhag